


Memoria Damnum

by celam



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Canon, Amnesia, Attempt at Humor, Flirting, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-03
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-11-22 17:32:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11385012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/celam/pseuds/celam
Summary: “Looks like Alec managed to drop two potion bottles to the ground and must have inhaled the fumes. One of them is the serum of truth, and the other one seems to cause temporary memory loss”.Alec knows he should not have followed them, now he has to deal with the consequences. Luckily, Magnus is there to help.





	Memoria Damnum

**Author's Note:**

> Well, here goes my first attempt at writing something. This is not beta'd so if anyone wants to offer corrections, you're more than welcome to contact me. See you on the other side.

“We shouldn’t be doing this”, Alec pointed out for the tenth time and Jace had to roll his eyes this time. “I’m Head of the Institute, okay? I should be punishing you for dragging me into this”.

“Leave the kinky stuff for Magnus”, Jace replied and Izzy had the nerve to laugh. “We’ll just look around for a moment and then leave. No harm, no foul”.

They were currently at Iris Rouse’s house that was now deserted since Magnus sent her to Idris. Clary has been trying for a month now to draw the sun rune again with no success, so she had the brilliant idea to go back to the place where she was able to use it for the first time in order to try to get it back. To say that Alec was shocked to the core for the stupidity of the plan was an understatement. Still, here he was.

“I still can’t get used to going to this kind of missions”, Simon said when they were arriving at the front door. The house looked completely empty, there were logs blocking the entrance and a sign that stated that the house was now available for rent. “I feel like we’re like the avengers, or something, you know?” Jace rolled his eyes and with Alec’s help, he started to take off the logs, making way.

“Am I Scarlett Johansson or Elizabeth Olsen?” Clary asked.

“Nah, I was thinking like the comic kind of avengers. If Magnus were here he would totally be Doctor Strange. Powerful, Asian, with magic powers and able to do portals and stuff”, Simon said cheerfully. Alec turned around to look at him, the door now open.

“Doctor who?” he asked.

“Doctor Stran- wait, was that a pun?” Simon asked and Alec cocked his head, said nothing and went inside. “Is he messing with me?” he asked Clary and she just shrugged and chuckled.

The main hall was dusty, the air heavy due to have all the windows and doors tightly closed. They stood there for a moment waiting to hear any noise from the rooms upstairs. Nothing happened.

“Let’s separate and search a room each so we do it faster”, Izzy said and they all nodded before going in different directions. Alec went upstairs, directly heading to a room at the end of a far corridor that caught his attention the first time that he was here. He opened the door when he arrived and saw multiple cases; all filled with all kind of potions. There was barely any room to move around the shelves. It vaguely reminded him of Magnus’ loft, except that instead of storing potions, he just kept ingredients and a countless amount of journals filled with recipes to prepare each. Also, his loft was actually clean.

He suddenly remembered that Madzie used to live here before Magnus rescued her and took her to Catarina to be taken care of. He wondered how she must be doing and made a mental note to tell Magnus to go together to pay her a visit. Being so busy with all of the stuff going on he almost forgot about her, guilt started to make his way onto his chest.

“Somebody’s here”, Izzy said from the corridor and Alec jumped at the sudden noise. He was so distracted thinking about Magnus and Madzie that he almost forgot why he was there on the first place. He took a seraph blade in case someone came into the room, the bow and arrow feeling too awkward and uncomfortable among so many shelves and so little space.

“Do you have eyes on them?” he asked to his sister just when she arrived to the potions room’s door.

“Look through the window”, she instructed. “There was a guy in a black suit. It looked like he was coming in”.

Alec looked through the window just when the guy looked at where he was standing.

“Shit”, he exclaimed and drew back, barely noticing the two bottles that he knocked down with the seraph blade on one of the shelves, about to smash onto the floor.

“Did he see you?” Izzy asked in a whisper. Alec got close to the window again and saw that the man was turning to leave, coming down the steps at the entrance, getting more and more out of view. Alec leaned against the shelf until the guy was gone for good.

“He’s gone”, he breathed relieved. And then, he barely had any time to register what was going on when the two bottles fell to the floor, mixed potions pooling on his feet.

“Guys, time to leave”, Izzy said through the door. They appeared a few moments later.

“Did you find anything of use?” Clary asked.

“No, sorry. I’m sure we’ll figure this out, okay? Don’t worry”, Izzy reassured her and Clary smiled. She should not feel disappointed, she kind of knew that she was not going to find any answers in here, but still she could not help to be hopeful. “Alec, come on”, Izzy said.

When no response came, the four of them went around the shelves looking for him. “What are you doing, man?” Jace asked when he found him. Alec was looking at his feet as if they had personally offended him. He raised his head, eyes a little glassy and unfocused.

“Who the fuck are you?” he asked, looking confused. Jace was about to answer when he saw the colorful purple liquid at his feet, pieces of glass floating on it.

“What-?” Izzy started saying at the same time that Simon asked “is he high?” But Jace stepped forward and picked up two of the biggest pieces of glass that contained the labels of the now broken potions.

“’Veritaserum’ and ‘Memoria Damnum’”, he read. “Well, this is fantastic”, Jace added sarcastically.

“Wait, what just happened?” Clary asked trying to catch up. Alec was looking at Simon now, shaking his head as if he disapproved of everything that he was seeing.

“Okay, since no one is going to say something, I will”, Alec suddenly said and everyone stared at him expectantly. “That hair color? Way too fake”, he said looking at Clary in disgust.

“What?” she asked. Jace sighed, trying to put the pieces together.

“Looks like Alec managed to drop two potion bottles to the ground and must have inhaled the fumes. One of them is the serum of truth, and the other one seems to cause temporary memory loss”, he concluded looking at Izzy, to see if she agreed. Her face full of distress told him that she had arrived to the same conclusion.

“Look, Blondie, you look like a nice guy… in a fuckboy kind of way, but what you’re saying is nonsense, okay? I don’t even know who you are”, Alec interfered.

“You do know who we are, Alec, you just don’t remember us”, Jace said patiently. “I’m Jace, this is Isabelle. We are your brother and sister. And they are Clary and Simon”.

Alec looked at him as if a second head had popped out of his neck. He stared at them, one at a time, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Nothing happened.

“Fuck”.

—— 

“If mom sees him she’s going to freak out”, Izzy said, almost dragging Alec through the institute to take him to his office.

At first they thought about taking him to Magnus’ loft but it would have raised suspicions that the just appointed Head of the Institute was not, well, on the Institute. So they decided to bring him there and then tell everyone that he was swamped with work making him unavailable to talk to anyone.

“What’s up with all the black clothes? Where’s the funeral?” Alec asked eyeing every shadowhunter that passed by their side.

“I know right?” Simon agreed. “I kinda like this Alec”.

Jace actually laughed. “Have you ever thought that you would hear Alec saying that?” he asked Izzy and she laughed too. Alec glared at both of them, failing to see what was so funny.

The people that saw them just nodded politely to Alec and he started to feel powerful. He had no idea, really, who he was but he was sort of enjoying all of this. Although nothing made sense and everyone was out of their minds. But, still. Fun. They finally arrived to his office and Jace pulled out his phone to call Magnus. Alec started to look around, taking on every single detail.

“This is… the most boring room in the world, wow”, he said looking at the copious amount of paperwork on top of the desk.

“Well, it is an office”, Simon said. “It’s not supposed to be, you know, fun”. Alec just stared at him and when it seemed that he was not going to say anything he opened his mouth.

“Do you ever shut up?”

Simon mumbled something like ‘are you serious?’ and went to stand next to Clary just when Jace spoke. “Magnus is at the door. I’ll be here in a second”. And with that he left, Izzy locking the door again behind him.

She was looking both amused and concerned at the same time. On one hand, she was scared because they had no idea about the side effects of this kind of potions. And on the other hand, it did not seem that her brother was actually suffering or anything. He was just blunt. More blunt, that is.

Alec felt like floating, but not in a sappy kind of way, more like actually floating. There was something about the potions that made him feel lightheaded and without any worries. The rational part of him that was hidden somewhere on his drugged mind, told him that he should be worried, he should be trying to find a way to fix this but he really could not care less. The company could have been better, though, they liked to talk way too much and worry about every little thing. It was kind of annoying.

There was a knock on the door and both Isabelle and Clary froze for a moment until they heard Jace on the other side. “Open up, it’s us”. Izzy opened the door and instantly went to hug Magnus for coming to their help so fast.

Alec looked up and the floating sensation grew even stronger. At the door was that blonde dude from before and behind him was standing the most beautiful man that Alec had ever seen. Even if he only could remember Blondie and Samuel, he knew for a fact that any other man that he had ever met was not as breathtaking as the one in front of him.

“Oh, my God”, he said under his breath. Clary looked at him. “Who are you?” he asked looking at Magnus but not loud enough for him to actually hear him. Clary chuckled.

“That is Magnus Bane”, she said. Alec started to comb his hair with his fingers, trying to look at least half as good as this man. Which he already knew it was impossible. Damn.

“That name is as fake as you hair”, he said and Clary rolled her eyes, “but I don’t give a fuck about that as long as he lets me ride h-”

“Alexander”, Magnus interrupted unknowingly Alec’s ranting. “How are you feeling?” he asked concerned. Alec had a tingling sensation all over his body. That voice was like honey, saying his full name as if it was something both pure and sinful at the same time. Who was this guy? Really.

“Are you a doctor?” he asked, “are you going to check me up?”

Jace face-palmed so hard that he probably left the imprint of his fingers on his face. Izzy did her best not to snort, while Clary and Simon just stood there looking shocked and amused.

Magnus smiled and raised an eyebrow. “I’m not a doctor. I’m a warlock, you see”, he said raising his hand on the air, letting blue smoke roll through and around it. Alec wasn’t paying attention to the magic, his attention focused on long, long, long fingers full of rings dancing in front of his face.

“It looks like you have very talented fingers, Mr. Bane”, Alec said feigning innocence. Jace wondered what kind of low quality porn movies Alec has watched to make him say these things, he made a mental note to ask him.

Magnus seemed taken aback by the bluntness but not less amused. “Why, thank you, Mr. Lightwood. They are, actually”, he said.

Alec checked Magnus out shamelessly. He was all hard muscles beneath a dress shirt that it seemed that it could barely hold his arms without ripping apart. Alec had the sudden need to be put on a chokehold. “Will I have to take your word for it or will you show me?” he asked. Magnus stepped forward, chuckling softly.

“Isabelle”, he said still looking at Alec, “give me the pieces of glass from the bottles”. Alec was looking at him with a glint on his eyes and pupils blown completely black. Magnus was used to this look, but he never saw it when there were so many people present. It was a little unnerving and exciting at the same time. Well, he did not allow himself to see the situation exciting until he checked if Alec was safe.

Isabelle handed him the pieces of glass and Magnus started to examine them, cat eyes making an appearance. He heard Alec’s intake of breath and a ‘so hot’ being murmured. Magnus grinned at him and then continued to examine the remains, blue smoke covering them, tracing every ingredient that was used to create them.

If anyone was uncomfortable by Alec's behavior they did not show it. Alec did not really care, though. The air became thicker the second that Magnus stepped through the door and his full attention was on him now, unable to think about something else. He wondered who this guy was on his life and if he always felt like this around him, or if it was a side effect from one of the potions. Either way, he hoped he was not some kind of relative or he would have to move to Jakarta and never come back.

“Well, good news”, Magnus said a couple of minutes later. “It seems that the potions were made without any ulterior motives, let’s say. They are just regular potions. The effect should wear off in probably eight hours since Alec did not drink them it won’t last as long as it should”. Everyone exhaled in relief.

“Are you saying that there are not side effects?” Clary suddenly asked. “Surely someone that drinks ‘Veritaserum’ is not as blunt. They only can’t lie when asked a direct question, right?”

Magnus thought for a second. “Well, since Alec also inhaled the fumes of the ‘Memoria Damnum’, it seems that every kind of… um, social convention that he grew up in just doesn’t affect him. He can't remember what he was taught as appropriate behavior”.

Everyone started to think what that could possibly mean.

“Wait”, Izzy interrupted, “are you saying that this is basically Alec, normal Alec, without a filter?”

“In simple words, yeah”, Magnus shrugged.

“By the Angel”, she said looking at her brother, “this is amazing”. She chuckled. She always tried to get Alec to let loose, but she never expected that this is what she would find. Alec was a flirt, pretty much, but only with Magnus, and that is who he would be if it was not for the external influences that he received growing up. She wondered how she would be for a second.

“You know what would really be amazing right now?” Alec suddenly said, “if you just left me alone with Doctor Strange here”. Magnus raised an eyebrow.

“I knew he knew who Doctor Strange was”, Simon exclaimed and they looked at him, “he was pretending he didn’t know before, remember?”

“The point is”, Alec said as if no one had interrupted him, Simon sighed and Clary kissed his cheek “that this my office and the only one allowed now is Mr. Bane. The rest can just go and… hunt those shadows, or whatever it is that you do”. Magnus smiled and went to stand in front of Alec, looking at him straight in the eyes.

“I’m sorry, darling, but I have a boyfriend”, he said.

The floaty feeling suddenly disappeared and he was left with sort of a sorrowful emotion going around his chest. He noticed that his attention was still on Magnus but now it was disappointing, he kind of felt like a kid would feel if his mother refused to buy him something that he really wanted.

“What?” Alec’s face fell entirely and it took all of Magnus’ willpower not to laugh at him along with the rest. “He… he doesn’t have to know, right? Isn’t that what they say?” he said pathetically.

He knew he was trying too hard now, but he felt some sort of connection with the guy, it was almost unbelievable for him to think that they did not have a chance, that they were soulmates or some cheesy shit like that. Even if he could not remember who he was.

Magnus sighed. “I’m sorry, but I’ve always been a one-soul-at-a-time kind of guy”.

Alec looked actually sad by learning that this complete stranger was taken and Magnus almost took pity on him and told him the truth when there was another knock on the door.

Everybody froze, thinking what to do next, but Alec decided for them.

“What?!” he yelled in a very bad mood now, completely different from the previous Alec. The only thing that he cared about in all of this ordeal was Magnus, so who cares now if he does not act like he is supposed to. Fuck this people. Fuck Magnus. In every sense of the word, damn it.

“Alec? I need to talk to you”, Maryse’s voice came from the other side. “Open the door”.

“Fuck of-”, Alec started to say when Izzy put a hand on his mouth.

“Alec, that’s our mother”, she whispered angrily at him, “you can’t talk to her like that”.

“What did you say?” Maryse asked confused.

“One second, Maryse”, Jace interfered and then turned to Alec, “do not say a word unless she asks you something directly, okay? We’ll try to talk to her, you just pretend that you’re busy working or something”. Alec scoffed at him, why would he do that? “Alec, come on”.

“Alexander”, Magnus interjected, “if you do what Jace says I’ll go out with you”.

He was kind of floating again, and his head started to spin a little. He pretended to look uninterested, though. “What about your boyfriend?”, he asked.

“I’ll break up with him”, Magnus lied and Alec studied him for a second, not quite believing him. There was some sort of desperation inside of his brown eyes, cat eyes gone now. Alec missed them already.

“Give me your number”, Alec said.

“Alec, you already have his number”, Jace said.

“Alec?” Maryse called again.

“Okay, okay, here”, said Magnus giving him a business card. Alec examined it closely. It was purple, the same color than Magnus’ nail polish. He wondered if he changed the colors everyday in order to match his outfit. That would be impressive.

“How do I know if this number is real?” he asked and everyone started to complain, asking him to drop it. “Oh, okay, dammit. Let the annoying woman in, God”.

Jace opened the door and Maryse came in, already looking suspicious. Her eyes landed on Alec as soon as she was in the middle of the room, trying to ignore the fact that she considered that there were too many people in the room, but it was Alec’s office now. It was his decision.

“Everything alright?” she asked and everyone nodded their heads. “Okay… Alec, are you ready?”

Alec pretended to be looking at papers that he had no idea what they were about, but he was actually looking at Magnus’ card, trying to see if the numbers could be fake. He found them kind of familiar, but still, he would not know unless he called Magnus now. He could do that.

“Alec”, Maryse tried again and Izzy elbowed him on the ribs.

“What the f-?” he started saying when he noticed that everyone’s attention was on his mother. “Oh, sorry, what?”

“I asked you if you’re ready. For the meeting?” Maryse asked carefully.

Alec thought of everything that he apparently was and tried to come up with an answer that would probably make sense to her. He was obviously a super boring person, with boring papers, and a boring office. He was not sleeping with Magnus Bane, which is the thing that he found the most outrageous, but he knew him so he maybe saw him on a daily basis. It was easy. He was a stuck-up, sexually frustrated, boring as fuck asshole.

“Oh, yes. Of course”, he said enthusiastically. “I love meetings”.

Maryse narrowed her eyes when Magnus stepped in. “He’s just a little stressed, that’s all”.

Maryse looked at him noticing his presence in the room for the first time. “Magnus”, she said, “I didn’t see you there. I thought you weren’t coming to the meeting. Or are you not on business but visiting the boyfriend?” Alec scoffed again. Visiting the boyfriend. What? So Magnus’ boyfriend was on the building. Oh, my God. What if he was in the room? Salmon looks like he is in a relationship or something with the redhead. Blondie did go to call him earlier. But why him? Is he Magnus’ boyfriend? What? Pretty boy, get your team ready. Pretty boy.

“The meeting?” Magnus asked completely lost.

“About the Downworld situation. The Clave scheduled this meeting months ago, and it was going to be just a matter of the Clave. But now that Alec is Head of the Institute I suppose anyone is allowed in there”, she said without an ounce of malice and Magnus was a little bit shocked.

“I- I’d love to be there, thank you. Do you mind if I let Raphael, Meliorn and Luke know about this?” he asked.

“Uh, not at all, but I think you should ask Alec”, she said smiling.

If Blondie was going out with Magnus then he should have seen them kiss, right? Or Blondie should have gotten mad at Alec flirting with his boyfriend but he did not say anything. So maybe Magnus’ boyfriend was not in the room, and if he was, he had no idea who he was.

“Right”, Magnus said and tried to shift the attention from Alec once again “when is it?”

“In half an hour”, Maryse replied, “that’s why I came to check on Alec, but since he says he’s ready I guess I worried for nothing”.

Alec went back to the conversation just to hear the last part. This time only Magnus could hear him.

“Fuck”.

——

“Fuck, fuck, fuck”, Alec kept repeating over and over and Jace smacked him on the head.

“Stop that, we are trying to think what to do and you’re not helping, Alec”, he said.

It has been twenty minutes since Maryse’s visit and they had no idea now what to do. They could not say that Alec got sick because Maryse just saw him, it would not make any sense. They also could not say that there is an emergency because well, they would have to tell them what the emergency was.

“I don’t know if you know how to use a clock, it doesn’t look like you do, but there’s only ten minutes left to this shitshow that you’re about to drag me into”, Alec said. “There’s nothing we can do now”.

“Take it easy, Alexander”, Magnus said, coming to stand by his side. Alec felt his attention zeroing on him once again, the background filled with white noise and blurred images. “We’ll find a way. If anything, I love a challenge”.

I love a challenge. I love a challenge.

Alec felt as if a bucket of cold water was emptied on top of his head. The floaty feeling was now replaced by a headache that he was unable to shake. His head was hurting and there were voices and words running around his mind that did not make sense or were too loud or too low to understand them. “What did you say?” he asked Magnus.

“Hmm? I love a challenge?” Magnus asked confused.

I love a challenge. I love a challenge. I’ll be responsible for this one. Playing hard to get. I love a challenge.

“Say it again”, Alec said although the pain only grew stronger, he needed to hear those words again, he needed to understand what was going on inside his head.

“I love a challenge”, Magnus complied, looking at him closely.

Alexander. Would you like to go out for a drink sometime? I love a challenge. Alec closed his eyes, the light on the office was suddenly too bright, the colors too strong, the voices too loud, the air too heavy.

“Alexander”, Magnus said concerned, grabbing him by the shoulders. “Are you alright?” Help me. I need your strength. Take what you need. Alexander. Take what you need. He opened his eyes, feeling like things were starting to make sense now.

“I don’t think we’ve been formally introduced”, Alec said. The words sounded familiar but he could not pinpoint the moment that he formed them on his head before saying them out loud. Magnus blinked confused.

“Are you forgetting again?” he asked, trying to think if maybe a side effect could have been affecting him now, making him forget everything from the moment he inhaled the potions until now. Did he miss something? “I’m Magnus”.

I don’t think we’ve been formally introduced. Formally introduced. More like medium-rare. I’m Magnus. “Alexander?” I might be the High Warlock of Brooklyn, but even I can’t see the future. You watch the people you care about age and die. And die. And die. “Can you hear me? I’m here with you”. I always knew I couldn’t have what I wanted, until you came along. You. You. You. I love you. I want this. I love you. I’m all for effort. I love you. You. You. You. Do what’s in your heart. I think you’re right. You. You lose your breath everytime they enter a room. I can’t breathe. Magnus. Magnus Bane? Here at the Institute? “Alec, are you okay?” If anything were to happen to you. Age and die. Die. Die. I love you. Magnus, I love you. I. Love. You.

Alec looked around the room, everything was spinning, what was going on? Everybody was looking at him, concern clouding their faces.

“Alexander”, Magnus tried again, softly. Alec looked at him, the lust that he felt for him moments ago was now being overshadowed by something warmer, safer. His eyes were unfocused, he could feel that, glassy and full of unshed tears.

“Magnus”, he said, looking at him, trying to find the right words. “I think… I think I remember knowing you, or having you in my life. I- I’m- confused”. Confusion is part of it, that’s how you find out that something is there. “My head is about to explode”, he said closing his eyes again. I know you feel what I feel.

“You’re going to be okay, Alec, I promise”, Magnus said, scared now, his heart squeezing on his chest by seeing Alec so distressed. “Jace, we need a plan”. Pretty boy, get your team ready. Pretty boy. I’m talking to you. Pretty boy.

“At least he’s remembering now”, Jace added, not feeling as relieved as he tried to sound. “Maybe that’s something good”.

“We’ll have to see”, Magnus said. You never cease to amaze me, Alec.

——

“Stop fidgeting with your shirt, Alec, everything is going to be alright”, Magnus said, not actually believing his own words.

“I appreciate the support, hot pants, but I don’t believe you at all”, Alec said, reaching the table where the meeting was about to start.

“Hot pants? Really?” Magnus asked.

“What?” Alec said. “Don’t act like you don’t agree with me, you have mirrors, right?” Magnus just threw his head back and laughed. Alec wondered if shoving Magnus against a wall and biting his neck until he becomes a moaning mess under him could get him fired. Speaking of which. “Um, I’ve been meaning to ask you… what kind of relationship do we actually have?”

Magnus seemed that he was trying hard not to smile, and pretended to think for a moment or two. “Well, I think we could be considered… friends”.

“Friends? I never tried more with you? Am I that fucking stupid?” Alec said. Seriously, if he was that kind of guy he needed to be under the influence of potions 24/7 because being Magnus’ friend and not falling in love with the guy? Alec could not relate. Magnus laughed again and God, he could get used to hearing that sound.

“Alexander, we like each other very much. That’s all you need to know”, Magnus said and Alec wondered what the fuck was that supposed to mean.

Magnus wanted to tell him the truth, it was difficult not to do it, especially when Alec was coming to him like that, without an ounce of shame. But he had to remember that Alec was drugged now, he does not want to feel like he is taking advantage of his state. They would have time for that later. Now, getting Alec back to normal, and helping him from getting fired was the priority. He saw that Alec was about to say something when the people from the Clave started to arrive. Alec had no idea who this people were, so he just limited to nod politely at them and wait until all of this somehow fixed itself.

Eventually the headache started to disappear and he agreed to go to the meeting. He still felt lightheaded and some words were still clinging on his mind, being repeated like a mantra, except that they did not make any sense. Having Magnus by his side helped him, although he refused to tell Alec what kind of relationship they have. Maybe they were enemies or something like that.

“Luke, hi”, Magnus said and went to greet a man at the other side of the room. Alec had no idea who this Luke person was either, but he was handsome and with an easy smile, and he obviously knew Magnus. Jealousy came back and this time he was unable to push it aside.

“Alec”, Maryse said appearing by his side. “Are you okay? You look a bit… flushed”.

“I’m fine, lady”, he said and went to sit on his chair, he did not need anyone talking to him right now. He did not understand what was going on, his feelings were all over the place, he needed this to be over and sleep until the effects of the potions wore off. Maryse stood confused where she was.

Everybody sat down once they had found their rightful places, and Alec cleared his throat, already thinking over and over again the words that Jace, Izzy and Magnus have prepared for him. It should be easy. Well, here goes nothing, he thought.

“Good evening”, he said, a little overwhelmed to have every person in the room looking at him. At least fifteen pairs of eyes focused on him. He continued. “Since today’s meeting is about the fate of the Downworld, I decided that we don’t really have any voice on the matter. So I’m going to give the floor to the High Warlock of Brooklyn, Magnus Bane”. I’m not on my own, I’m here with you. High Warlock of Brooklyn.

Everyone seemed in discomfort but no one argued. Magnus stood up. “Thank you, Mr. Lightwood”. I have a tremendous respect for the new Head of the Institute. Alec tuned out then, trying to ignore the growing headache that was becoming more and more unbearable by the second. Random words and phrases triggered by other random words and phrases kept coming to his mind, making him feel dizzy. Luckily, nobody was looking at him, all of them focusing on Magnus. Alec tried to nod from time to time, pretending to support whatever it was that Magnus was saying, but in all honesty, he could not understand half of the words.

He tried to focus on the people now, to see if he could remember any of them. There was Magnus, of course. Me and Magnus, together. Thank Magnus. Together. The pain came back on full force and Alec tried to focus on someone else. The woman that went to his office, his mother. Mary? Maritza? Something in between, he could not remember her name. Luke, the guy that Magnus was talking to before, glanced at him for a moment and he seemed to notice that something was wrong with him but Alec managed to look as if he was concentrated on Magnus’ words. I got you something. It’s supposed to bring you luck and protection.

The clave members. There were clave members, too. Three, five, seven, eleven, thirteen members. No, fifteen. Fifteen members, all looking at Magnus in… fascination? Seventeen members. Seventeen. Seventeen hundred? Seventeen thousand? Seventeen thousand. Thousand. Seventeen thousand exes. Alec looked around the room, the pain now reaching every part of his head, going down onto his neck. The people is smiling, why? Are they laughing at him? Can they see he is in pain? No, they are laughing at something that Magnus said. Seventeen thousand. Men, women, seelies, warlocks, vampires, a djinn or two. How many? Seventeen thousand.

His insecurities started to kick in more and more strongly. Everybody on the room seemed engrossed looking at Magnus. I need you there, Magnus, but as a warlock representative, not as my boyfriend. Why are they looking at him like that? Seventeen thousand. They are laughing again. What is happening? Is he missing something? Why? Magnus is standing by Luke’s side now, he is looking at him fondly. Why? Is he one of the. Seventeen. Thousand. Magnus is smiling, too. We’re from totally different worlds. Different centuries. Seventeen thousand other memories.

Is Luke the boyfriend that his mother was talking about before? That does not make any sense, does it? Seventeen thousand. He keeps looking at Magnus, why is he not stopping? Seventeen thousand. Thousand. Thousand. Thousand.

“Okay”, he suddenly said, standing up. The pain was making the room spin, he felt like he was suffocating. He needed to say something, now. Enough. Magnus stopped talking mid-sentence and everyone was staring at Alec. “I know what all of you are thinking about so I’m just going to come out and say it”, Alec said, feeling like a lunatic now, but the fact that he could not remember meeting this people before gave him some sort of courage. Just like when you are drunk, he assumed.

“Alexander”, Magnus said, instantly going to stand by his side. “I think you should go”. I should go. Different centuries. I should go.

“What? No”. Alec said shaking his head, the movement making him almost stumble over his chair. Seventeen thousand. I should go. “You have to give the people what they want, so I’ll do it”. Alec took a deep breath and Magnus braced himself. “Magnus Bane? My boyfriend here-”

Of course. 

Magnus was his boyfriend. You never have to prove yourself to me, I love you. I love you, too. That’s why he felt like he only could focus on him, because he was in love. It was easy, really. How could he not notice something that comes to him as easy as breathing. Loving Magnus was such a strong part of him that he could not deny it even under the effects of the potions.

The necessity to let everyone know that he had seen Magnus first so they could all fuck off looking at him like that suddenly disappeared. Magnus loves him, not any of this people. Him. And he was looking at him, and a different feeling came now. One of pride and happiness, he was overwhelmed by how happy he felt now. But right now I’m here, with you. I don’t care how many people you’ve been with. Of course he did not. The only thing that mattered now was that he loved Magnus and Magnus loved him just as much. He wanted everyone to know. Everyone to know how amazing and wonderful the love of his life was. So he just continued talking at the same time that Maryse started to stand up to take him out of the room. “This man? Has the biggest dick I’ve ever seen”.

And he fainted.

——

Alec woke up on his bedroom hours later. His head still hurting. His mouth tasted so bad that he was sure that something crawled inside of it and died while he was asleep. “Is this what a hangover feels like?” he asked. His voice raspy due to the amount of hours that he spent sleeping. Jace chuckled by the side of the bed.

“Good morning, sunshine. How are you feeling?” he asked.

“Like I could die right now and everything would be fine”, Alec replied hiding his head on the pillows beneath him. Jace chuckled again. What is so funny?

“Back to your normal self, I see”, Jace said and then tried to look empathic towards Alec, failing miserably. The bastard. “Do you remember anything about yesterday?” he asked carefully.

Alec took a second to think and. Holy. Fucking. Shit. No. No. He kind of felt like crying, he really did. Instead he groaned under the pillows like mature adults would do. “Please tell me I didn’t say what I think I said”.

“About Magnus’ attributes? Oh, yeah, you did”, Jace said unable to stop himself from laughing. Alec only groaned louder. “Don’t worry, Magnus took care of it”.

Alec raised his head from under the pillows and looked at him incredulously. His hair was a mess, sticking in every possible direction, his eyes still a little glassy because of both the potions and sleeping. “What did he do?”

“He showed them”, Jace shrugged, “He pulled down his pants and said ‘let’s give the people what they wa-’”, Alec hit him then in the face with a pillow, as hard as he could. And Jace started laughing again.

“Fuck you”, Alec said. More like whined. But he is not going to admit that.

Suddenly the bedroom door opened and Alec felt like crying but out of relief.

“Ah, look who’s up”, Magnus said brightly while entering the room.

Alec pulled him by the wrist and forced him to lie down next to him. Maybe if he hides his face on Magnus’ neck and falls asleep again, all of this would have been a dream. Magnus embraced him with a chuckle.

“Please, tell me it was a bad dream and Jace is just messing with me”, Alec said, his voice muffled on Magnus’ neck. Magnus laughed and winked at Jace who was becoming redder and redder by the second, trying not to laugh too much.

“I never lied to you, Alexander”, Magnus said stroking his back. “And I never will”.

Alec groaned again and raised his head. “Did I really say that? To the Clave?”

“Darling, I wouldn’t forget about it even if I tried. Believe me, you said it”, Magnus confirmed. “And although I am extremely flattered and grateful, I think you should avoid that topic next time”.

Jace started laughing again and Alec wondered why doesn’t he have rocks on his bedside table to throw at people that is being fucking rude. He shook his head. “I can’t believe it. How can you be grateful? It was an important meeting about the fate of the downworld and I-”

“Alexander, relax”, Magnus interrupted calmly. “I told them that you were drugged during a mission, which is partially true, and asked them to dismiss the meeting. We’re picking it up from where we left off next week”.

Alec nodded and sighed. He still felt completely embarrassed and was already dreading the fact that he would have to come back in a week and see all that people again. But, oh well.

“And”, Magnus added, “of course I’m grateful. Do you have any idea how many times I wanted to say that? But it has to be someone else, if you say it yourself it doesn’t work. It's not the same”.

“Feel you, man”, Jace agreed, and Alec felt like he missed an opportunity back at Iris’ house. He should have broken a bottle of poison.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you guys liked it. See you on the next one.


End file.
